250+ Funny Dad Jokes That Are So Bad They’re The Best (2025)
Dad jokes are back — and they’re funnier, sillier, and even worse than ever! Whether you love a classic pun or a cringe-worthy one-liner, these funny dad jokes are guaranteed to make you laugh, groan, and shake your head all at the same time.
In this ultimate collection, you’ll find the best dad jokes, bad dad jokes, and even some terrible ones that are so dumb, they’re actually brilliant. We’ve got corny jokes for family dinners, clean dad jokes for kids, and even a few dirty dad jokes for adults (don’t worry — they’re still safe enough to share with friends).
Looking for laughs at work? Try our dad jokes for work. Need something for a party? Check out our birthday dad jokes. Want a classic setup? We’ve got tons of knock knock dad jokes too. From dumb dad jokes to good ones, this massive list of 250+ dad jokes has something for every mood, moment, and occasion.
Funny Dad Jokes
Prepare to laugh out loud with the funniest, new and fresh dad jokes — guaranteed to bring a smile to your face every time!
1. What do you call a wizardly dog?
A Labra-cadabra-dog!
2. Why was the algebra book feeling down?
It had too many issues to solve!
3. How does a penguin put together its home?
It builds it with ice-cold precision!
4. Why did the stuffed bear skip the sweet treats?
It was already packed to the brim!
5. Why shouldn’t you ever put your trust in stairs?
They’re always up to some kind of mischief!
6. What did one dish say to the other?
The next round’s on me!
7. How do you snare a squirrel?
Climb a tree and start acting a little nutty!
8. What’s the most popular subject for a snake?
Hiss-tory lessons!
9. Why do oranges put on sunscreen?
To prevent themselves from getting too peel-ed!
10. Why can’t a nose be a foot long?
Because that would make it a foot!
11. Why do cows wear bells around their necks?
Because their horns don’t do the trick!
12. Why don’t skeletons carry around smartphones?
They’ve got no body to chat with!
13. How do you create a lemon drop?
You just let it fall from your hand!
14. What kind of music does a balloon hate the most?
Anything that pops!
15. Why did the banana make a doctor’s appointment?
It wasn’t feeling quite a-peel-ing!
16. Why did the belt end up behind bars?
It was caught holding up some pants!
17. How do trees log onto the internet?
They enter with their username and “leaf” a password!
18. What type of footwear do frogs wear?
Open-toe shoes!
19. What do you call a computer with a good singing voice?
A-Dell, of course!
20. Why does the skeleton dread being in the living room?
It doesn’t have the bones to survive the conversation!
21. Why don’t you bother writing with a busted pencil?
It’s got no point to make!
22. What’s a vampire’s snack of choice?
Blood oranges—super refreshing!
23. Why can’t you ever rely on the ocean?
It’s always up to some slippery trickery!
24. What’s an astronaut’s go-to key on the keyboard?
The space bar, obviously!
25. Why don’t you challenge a cloud to a duel?
Because it’s always floating above it all!
26. Why did the chef start telling jokes?
He had a recipe for humor!
Best Dad Jokes
1. Why don’t seagulls soar over the bay?
Because they’d be known as bagels instead!
2. Why was the broom running late?
It got caught up sweeping around!
3. I once worked as a baker,
But I couldn’t make enough bread!
4. Why did the chicken hop over to the playground?
It was headed for the other slide!
5. I’m reading a book about glue.
I just can’t bring myself to put it down!
6. I tried arranging a hide-and-seek competition,
But finding good players was impossible!
7. Why did the coffee file a complaint?
It got mugged!
8. What part of a fish has the best rhythm?
The scales, of course!
9. How do cows keep up with current events?
They read the moo-s-paper!
10. I told my dog a funny story.
He didn’t understand, but his paw-sitive reaction was priceless!
11. Why don’t spiders attend school?
They get all their knowledge off the web!
12. How does the moon style its hair?
It just eclipses it!
13. I didn’t care for facial hair at first,
But over time, it really grew on me!
14. How do you throw a great party in space?
You just gotta planet!
15. What’s a ninja’s favorite footwear?
Sneakers, of course!
16. Why are ghosts such poor liars?
Because their transparency gives them away!
17. I’m on a seafood-only diet.
I see food and eat it right away!
18. Why do bees have such messy hair?
Because they use honeycombs to style it!
19. How does a train snack?
It goes “chew, chew”!
20. Why do vampires struggle to make friends?
Because they’re always a pain in the neck!
21. What’s brown, fuzzy, and wearing shades?
A really cool coconut!
22. Why did the tomato turn all red?
Because it saw the salad undressing!
23. Why don’t skeletons ever get into fights?
They don’t have the guts for it!
24. Why won’t skeletons attend parties?
Because they don’t have anyone to dance with!
25. Why does the pterodactyl stay quiet in the restroom?
The “P” is silent!
26. What do you call imitation pasta?
An impasta!
27. Why did the scarecrow win the prize?
He was simply outstanding in his field!
28. Why don’t eggs ever crack jokes?
They might just crack up!
29. How does a vampire begin a letter?
“Tomb it may concern…”
30. What did the ocean say to the shore?
Nothing—just a gentle wave!
31. Why did the bicycle tip over?
It was two-tired to stand!
Great Dad Jokes
1. Why do skeletons avoid getting into fights?
They don’t have enough strength to stand their ground!
2. What do you call fake noodles?
A pasta-imposter!
3. Why is it so peaceful when a pterodactyl uses the restroom?
Because the “P” is silent!
4. How do penguins build their homes?
They igloo it all together!
5. What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
Not-your cheese!
6. Why did the bicycle fall over?
It was simply too tired!
7. Why did the scarecrow get an award?
He was excellent at his job—outstanding in his field!
8. Why don’t eggs ever tell jokes?
Because they might crack up!
9. What did the beach say to the waves?
Nothing—just sent a little wave!
10. What’s brown, slippery, and stuck on the ground?
A stick!
11. Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad undressing!
12. How does a vampire start a letter?
“I trust this message finds you well…”
13. Why should you never trust a staircase?
It’s always up to something sneaky!
14. Why do cows have bells?
Because their horns aren’t reliable!
15. What’s a snake’s favorite school subject?
History!
16. Why don’t spiders go to school?
They’ve already learned everything on the web!
17. the worst music genre for a balloon?
Pop music!
18. Why did the coffee go to the police?
It had been mugged!
19. How do you get ready for a space-themed event?
You gotta planet ahead!
Dad Jokes Humor
1. Why don’t skeletons ever get into debates?
They don’t have the backbone for it!
2. What do you call fake pasta?
An impasta!
3. Why did the bike topple over?
Because it was two-tired!
4. What’s brown, sticky, and impossible to get off?
A stick!
5. Why did the scarecrow earn recognition?
He was simply outstanding in his role!
6. What do you call a fish that can’t see?
Fsh!
7. Why did the coffee call the cops?
It got mugged!
8. How does a train enjoy its food?
It just goes chew, chew, chew!
9. What room do skeletons avoid at all costs?
The living room!
10. Why don’t eggs crack jokes?
Because they’re afraid of cracking up!
11. Why shouldn’t you trust a staircase?
It’s always scheming something!
12. Why did the chicken join the band?
It had some serious drumsticks!
13. What did the ocean give to the beach?
Nothing—just a friendly wave!
Dad Jokes For Adults
1. Why did the calendar seek a job?
It wanted to be more than just a date—it was looking for a full-time gig!
2. I told my wife I’m like fine wine.
I improve with age—but I’m often kept in a dark place!
3. I accidentally gave my wife glue instead of lip balm.
She hasn’t been talking to me since!
4. Why don’t batteries spill the beans?
They’re worried they might leak!
5. Why do clocks avoid drama?
They just don’t have the time for it!
6. Why don’t ghosts use dating apps?
They don’t have the “boo” factor!
7. My wife said I should work out more.
So, I started lifting my spirits… with extra snacks!
8. Why did the lightbulb seek counseling?
It was struggling to cope with all the stress and burnout!
9. I used to dread my job as a waiter,
But now I just dish out bad jokes for a living!
10. Why did the TV visit the bar?
It was looking for a better connection!
11. My wife asked why I’m so bad at laundry.
I told her it’s because I already have too much “dirty laundry” to deal with!
12. Why don’t computers get exhausted?
They’re great at taking power naps!
13. I told my friend I’m keeping an eye on my weight.
It’s much easier than actually lifting it!
14. I told my wife I’m a genius.
She replied, “Sure… a genius at making excuses!”
15. Why don’t skeletons host parties?
Because they don’t have anyone to bone up on party skills with!
16. I’m on a seafood diet.
I see food, and I can’t resist eating it!
17. Why don’t pencils get hitched?
They’re afraid of commitment—too many sharp points!
18. I asked the coffee why it was always so bitter.
It said, “I’ve been through the grinder!”
19. Why don’t candles ever win races?
They burn out way too quickly!
Corny Dad Jokes
1. Why did the farmer’s scarecrow win first place?
Because he was simply outstanding in his field!
2. Why shouldn’t you tell secrets in a cornfield?
Because the corn has ears!
3. What type of cheese isn’t yours?
Nacho cheese, of course!
4. Why don’t skeletons ever have arguments?
They just don’t have the guts for it.
5. Why was the math textbook feeling down?
It was dealing with way too many problems.
6. Why do eggs avoid cracking jokes?
They’re worried they’ll break under the pressure.
7. What’s orange and makes a funny noise?
A carrot with a sense of humor!
8. What do you call a toothless bear?
A gummy bear!
9. Why do oysters keep their treasures hidden?
Because they’re naturally shellfish!
10. How do astronauts throw a party?
They simply planet ahead!
11. Why did the tomato blush so hard?
It caught the salad getting dressed!
12. What’s brown and often sticks to you?
A stick, obviously!
13. What’s the name for a fake noodle?
An impasta on your plate!
14. Why are stairs so sneaky?
Because they’re always up to no good!
15. What happens when two monkeys share a subscription?
They become Prime-mates!
16. Why did the bike fall over while parked?
It just couldn’t keep up—it was two tired.
17. What did one wall whisper to the other?
“Let’s meet up at the corner!”
18. Why was the cookie feeling blue?
It was all crumbled inside.
19. What’s a dog who performs magic tricks called?
A labracadabrador!
20. How do penguins put their houses together?
They just igloo them piece by piece.
21. Why can’t noses grow to be a foot long?
Because then they’d just be called feet!
22. What do you call a snowman with muscles?
An abdominal snowman with snow-packed abs!
23. Why did the broom get caught slacking off?
It was sweeping its mistakes under the rug!
Good Dad Jokes
1. Why don’t skeletons ever pick up their phones?
They don’t have the guts to answer!
2. Why was the math textbook feeling down?
It had too many issues to solve!
3. Why did the computer need a doctor’s appointment?
It caught a virus!
4. Why did the chicken join a music group?
Because it had the drumsticks!
5. How do you plan a party in space?
You simply planet ahead!
6. What did the fisherman say to the fish he caught?
“You’re quite the catch!”
7. Why do bees have sticky hair?
They use honeycombs to style it!
8. What did the lettuce say to the celery?
“Lettuce stay friends!”
9. Why don’t seagulls fly over the bay?
Because they’d be called bagels!
10. Why did the baker go to counseling?
He really kneaded the help!
11. What’s a vampire’s favorite kind of fruit?
A blood orange!
12. Why don’t you ever play cards in the jungle?
Because there are too many cheetahs!
13. How do you get a tissue to dance?
You add a little boogey to it!
14. Why do cows have hooves instead of feet?
Because they lactose!
15. Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
Because he was outstanding at his job!
16. What did the broom say to the dustpan?
“You’re sweeping me off my feet!”
17. What’s a snowman’s go-to breakfast?
Frosted flakes!
Bad Dad Jokes
Here are 21 bad dad jokes for you:
1. How do cows keep up with the news?
They check out the moos-paper!
2. Why don’t windows spill the beans?
Because they’d crack under pressure!
3. What did the clock say to the calendar?
“Your days are numbered!”
4. Why did the shoelace refuse to compete?
It didn’t want to get tied up!
5. What did the lightbulb say when it was nervous?
“I’m feeling kind of dim!”
6. How did the banana answer the phone?
“Yellow!”
7. Why don’t clouds carry cash?
They prefer using rain checks!
8. What’s a tree’s go-to drink?
Root beer!
9. Why don’t mirrors ever tell lies?
Because they always reflect the truth!
10. How do you stop a tomato from being nosy?
Tell it to ketchup later!
11. What did the pencil say to the eraser?
“You’re the biggest mistake I’ve ever made!”
12. How do birds send messages?
They tweet each other!
13. Why did the bread go to counseling?
It had too many loaf problems!
14. How do you repair a broken pizza?
With some tomato paste!
15. What did the chair say to the table?
“Stop leaning on me!”
16. Why did the jacket refuse to go outside?
It couldn’t handle the cold shoulder!
17. Why did the washing machine join the band?
It loved the spin cycle!
18. What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
19. How do you make a tissue groove?
Put a little boogie in it!
20. Why did the tomato lose the race?
It couldn’t ketchup in time!
21. How do bees travel to school?
They take the buzz stop!
Terrible Dad Jokes
1. Why don’t skeletons ever get into fights?
They just don’t have the guts!
2. What do you call pasta that’s faking it?
An impasta!
3. Why did the bicycle fall over?
It couldn’t stand up—it was two-tired!
4. What happens when grapes get squashed?
They release a little wine!
5. Why can’t Elsa be trusted with a balloon?
She’ll just let it go!
6. How do penguins build their homes?
They igloo it, one step at a time!
7. Why did the salad get embarrassed?
It saw the dressing!
8. Why was the broom running late?
It swept up too much work!
9. What’s the best kind of sticky object?
A stick!
10. Why don’t eggs tell jokes?
Because they crack under pressure!
11. What type of bear has no teeth?
A gummy bear!
12. What happens when two oceans meet?
They simply wave at each other!
13. Why did the chicken start drumming?
It had its own drumsticks!
14. Why don’t skeletons use cell phones?
They can’t hold them—no hands!
15. What’s the worst room for a skeleton to be in?
The living room—it’s just too lively!
16. Why are stairs so sneaky?
They’re always up to something!
17. What’s green and sings like a legend?
Elvis Parsley!
18. How do trains enjoy their meals?
They go chew-chew!
19. What did the beach say to the shore?
It just waved!
20. Why does a golfer carry extra pants?
In case they get a hole in one!
21. Why did the wheel topple over?
It was feeling a bit tired!
22. What’s a vampire’s favorite snack?
A bloody delicious orange!
Dirty Dad Jokes
1. Why did the scarecrow get promoted?
He was truly outstanding in his field!
2. Why are cemeteries so loud?
Because everyone’s always coffin!
3. What’s the best part about jokes about dirt?
They’re always grounded in humor.
4. Why don’t mountains get exhausted?
Because they remain well-grounded!
5. Why was the soil always in trouble?
It had a habit of making dirty jokes!
6. Why don’t worms keep secrets?
They can’t keep things under wraps—literally!
7. Why did the farmer turn red?
Because the corn was all ears!
8. Why do potatoes love to joke around?
Because they’re mashed with humor!
9. What did the garden bed say to the gardener?
“Stop hoeing around!”
10. Why did the compost pile burst into laughter?
It heard a truly rotten joke!
11. Why are shovels such great comedians?
They always dig up hilarious material!
12. Why don’t plants get into arguments?
They prefer to keep things rooted in harmony.
13. Why did the farmer get along so well with the soil?
They had great chemistry together!
14. Why did the wheelbarrow protest?
It was tired of being pushed around!
15. What’s a gardener’s favorite kind of music?
Heavy mulch-al tunes!
16. Why don’t rocks tell raunchy jokes?
Because they like to keep things squeaky clean!
17. Why did the tree feel so grimy?
It was involved in some shady business!
18. What’s the most inappropriate joke in the garden?
The one that made the worms wiggle with laughter!
Dumb Dad Jokes
1. Why did the cow blast off into space?
To visit the Milky Way!
2. What do you call a lazy kangaroo?
A pouch potato!
3. Why don’t crabs ever donate?
Because they’re a bit shellfish.
4. What did the ocean say to the shore?
It didn’t say a word—it just waved!
5. How do trees access the internet?
They just log in!
6. Why was the computer feeling chilly?
It left its Windows open!
7. What’s a ghost’s favorite snack?
Boo-berries!
8. Why don’t you hear any duck jokes?
Because they always quack you up!
9. Why did the squirrel perch on the lamp?
It wanted to get a little nuts!
10. Why don’t bread jokes ever land?
They’re always a bit stale.
11. What did one toothbrush tell the other?
“You really need to brush up on your humor!”
12. Why was the calendar so well-liked?
It always had so many good dates!
13. How does the moon get a trim?
It eclipses its hair!
14. Why did the spider go online?
To check its webmail!
15. What did the paper say to the pencil?
“You’re looking sharp today!”
16. Why don’t mountains ever get exhausted?
Because they remain firmly grounded!
17. How do bees get to their classes?
On the buzz!
Themed Dad Jokes For Every Occasion
Whether you’re looking to lighten the mood or crack up your friends, this collection of dad jokes is sure to deliver the laughs for any occasion!
Birthday Dad Jokes
1. Why do birthdays always feel like a new beginning?
Because you’re a year older—and hopefully a bit wiser!
2. Why don’t birthday cakes ever spill the tea?
They keep everything sweet and under wraps!
3. Why was the gift so eager to be wrapped?
It wanted to make the perfect first impression!
4. How do you make a birthday celebration unforgettable?
Just “add” a little extra fun with each passing year!
5. Why didn’t the balloon want to attend the birthday bash?
It was feeling a bit deflated!
6. What do you call a dog that loves birthdays?
A total party animal!
7. Why don’t people spill secrets on their birthday?
Because everyone’s too busy listening for the cake!
8. What did the gift say to the card?
“Let’s stick together and make this day unforgettable!”
9. Why do birthday parties always bring out the best in people?
Because everyone enjoys aging with a bit of flair!
Dad Jokes For Work
1. Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
Because he was exceptional at what he does—standing out in his field!
2. Why don’t skeletons ever hold office jobs?
They’ve got no flesh for the work—just bones!
3. Why did the computer look for employment?
It needed a byte to munch on!
4. Why aren’t calculators great teammates?
They just keep multiplying problems!
5. Why was the pencil let go?
It couldn’t draw any conclusions!
6. How do lumberjacks keep track of their shifts?
They log every hour they work!
7. Why did the worker snack on a clock?
He was trying to kill some time!
8. Why do bees have sticky jobs?
Because they’re always buzzing around their honeycombs!
9. Why did the tomato turn red at the office?
It saw the salad getting dressed!
See also 100 Funny Mom Jokes
Knock Knock Dad Jokes
1. Knock knock.
Who’s there? Lettuce.
Lettuce have some fun and laugh together!
2. Knock knock.
Who’s there? Boo.
Don’t cry, it’s just a silly knock-knock joke!
3. Knock knock.
Who’s there? Cow says.
Cow says it’s time to enjoy some laughter!
4. Knock knock.
Who’s there? Tank.
Tank goodness we’re having joke time!
5. Knock knock.
Who’s there? Olive.
Olive you and all your awesome jokes!
6. Knock knock.
Who’s there? Harry.
Harry up, I’ve got more jokes to share!
7. Knock knock.
Who’s there? Butter.
Butter be quick, I’m running out of jokes!
8. Knock knock.
Who’s there? Atch.
Atch you’re happy I’m telling jokes and not singing!
9. Knock knock.
Who’s there? Orange.
Orange you glad I didn’t ask you to guess?
10. Knock knock.
Who’s there? Canoe.
Canoe believe how great these jokes are?
Silly Dad Jokes
1. Why did the coffee need to make a report?
It got mugged!
2. Why did the computer go to the doctor?
It caught a virus!
3. What’s brown and sticks to everything?
A stick!
4. Why don’t skeletons get into fights?
They lack the courage!
5. What’s a skeleton’s least favorite game?
Basketball—can’t make a shot!
6. What do you call a bull that’s resting?
A bulldozer!
7. Why did the bicycle tip over?
It was exhausted!
See also 110+ Funny Math Jokes and Puns
Conclusion
Dad jokes offer a perfect blend of humor and charm that’s impossible to resist. Whether they’re corny, silly, awkward, or even bad dad jokes, these jokes are sure to brighten any mood. Whether you’re sharing them at family gatherings, cracking them at work with dad jokes for coworkers, or using them to impress friends with funny dad jokes, they’re the perfect way to bring everyone together for a good laugh.
From groan-worthy one-liners to classic knock knock dad jokes, bad dad jokes add that extra level of humor, even if they’re so cheesy they make you cringe. With over 250 dad jokes in your collection, you’re ready to spread smiles and laughter wherever you go. So, the next time you need some lighthearted humor, just reach for a bad dad joke or a silly dad joke — because sometimes, the best jokes are the ones that leave everyone smiling, even if they’re a little bit cringe-worthy!
