140+ Funny Snake Jokes And Puns To Rattle Your Funny Bone
Get ready to laugh with some of the funniest snake jokes out there! Whether you’re looking for clean snake jokes for kids, silly puns, or smart one-liners, there’s a joke here for everyone. Enjoy a mix of funny snake jokes, clever snake jokes for adults, and laugh-out-loud knock-knock snake jokes that never get old.
Fans of wordplay will love the creative snake puns, and if you like quick laughs, don’t miss the snake jokes one liners. There are even a few witty snake jokes for those who enjoy a clever twist. Perfect for kids, adults, and everyone in between — these snake jokes are full of hiss-terical fun!
Funny Snake Jokes
1. Why don’t snakes ever get lost?
Because they always follow their hiss-tory!
2. Why did the snake go to school?
To improve his hiss-tory!
3. What’s a snake’s favorite subject?
Hiss-tory.
4. Why are snakes so good at math?
Because they know how to add hiss-es.
5. Why don’t snakes ever tell jokes?
Because they don’t want to rattle anyone.
6. What kind of snake does a librarian have?
A read-er snake!
7. Why did the snake bring a ladder?
Because he wanted to scale new heights.
8. What do snakes use to clean themselves?
Hiss and shine.
9. What’s a snake’s favorite movie?
“Anaconda” of course!
10. What do you call a sleeping snake?
A nap-py python.
11. Why did the snake join the band?
Because he had the best scales.
12. What do you call a snake with a great sense of humor?
A hiss-terical reptile.
13. Why did the snake go to the doctor?
He was feeling a little rattled.
14. What’s a snake’s favorite dance?
The slither-step.
15. How do snakes stay in shape?
By doing hiss-ups!
16. Why do snakes make terrible comedians?
Because their jokes always fall flat.

17. What did the snake say to his reflection?
“Stop copying me!”
18. Why don’t snakes ever get invited to parties?
Because they’re always a little hiss-y.
19. What’s a snake’s favorite candy?
Swee-tarts.
20. Why did the snake get promoted?
Because he was outstanding in his field.
21. How do snakes communicate?
Through hiss and tell.
22. Why was the snake so good at basketball?
Because he had great hiss-terical moves.
23. What’s a snake’s favorite instrument?
The hiss-itar.
24. What do you call a snake who loves to party?
A boa-ling ball.
25. Why did the snake go to the gym?
To work on his core hiss-ues.
26. What do snakes use to stay cool?
A hiss-conditioning unit.
27. Why did the snake bring a suitcase?
Because he was going on a hiss-cation.
28. What do you call a snake with no teeth?
A gummy boa.
29. Why was the snake always calm?
Because he had great hiss-control.
30. What’s a snake’s favorite game?
Hide and hiss.
31. Why did the snake wear glasses?
Because he wanted to improve his hiss-ion.
32. Why don’t snakes use computers?
Because they’re afraid of the mouse!
Snake Jokes For Kids
1. Why did the snake cross the road?
To get to the hiss-side!
2. Why don’t snakes ever get lost?
Because they follow their hiss-tory!
3. What’s a snake’s favorite subject in school?
Hiss-tory!
4. Why did the snake go to the doctor?
Because he felt a little rattled.
5. What do snakes like to eat for dessert?
Hiss-terical cupcakes!
6. How do snakes stay in shape?
By doing hiss-ups!
7. What kind of snake tells jokes?
A hiss-terical snake!
8. What do you call a snake with no teeth?
A gummy snake!
9. Why did the snake bring a suitcase?
Because he was going on a hiss-cation!
10. What’s a snake’s favorite dance?
The slither-slide!
11. Why did the snake bring a ladder?
To scale new heights!
12. Why did the snake get a job?
To make some hiss-money!
13. What do you call a sleepy snake?
A nap-python!
14. What do snakes say when they greet each other?
“Hisssss, friend!”
15. Why did the snake sit in the sun?
To warm his hiss!
16. What kind of snake loves reading?
A book-python!
17. Why don’t snakes like fast food?
Because they can’t catch it!
18. What’s a snake’s favorite instrument?
The hiss-itar!
See also 80+ Funny Frog Jokes And Puns
Snake Jokes For Adults
1. Why do snakes never make good secret agents?
Because they always hiss under pressure.
2. What do you call a snake who’s a smooth talker?
A real hiss-ter.
3. Why did the snake start a tech company?
Because he wanted to scale up his business.
4. What’s a snake’s favorite way to relax?
Netflix and hiss.
5. Why don’t snakes ever get promoted?
Because they’re always caught rattling around.
6. What did the snake say after a bad breakup?
“I’m done with all this hiss-terics.”
7. Why was the snake a terrible liar?
Because you could always see right through his scales.
8. What do snakes do when they’re stressed?
They go for a hiss and a walk.
9. Why did the snake refuse to share his food?
Because he was a little hissy about it.
10. What do you call a snake who writes mystery novels?
An Edgar Allan Poe-thon.
11. What’s a snake’s favorite social media?
Hiss-book.
12. Why do snakes hate the rain?
Because it ruins their hiss-terical plans.
13. Why was the snake always calm at work?
Because he practiced hiss-control.
14. What do snakes do at parties?
They throw a boa bash.
15. How do snakes send messages?
By hiss-mail.
16. Why did the snake get into stand-up comedy?
Because he was a hiss-terical performer.
17. What’s a snake’s favorite type of music?
Heavy hiss-teria!
Wittly Snake Jokes
1. Why don’t snakes make good therapists?
Because they always twist your words!
2. What’s a snake’s favorite way to solve problems?
By sssss-strategizing.
3. Why did the snake ace the spelling bee?
Because he knew how to hiss every word!
4. What do you call a snake that writes poetry?
A sly-llable expert.
5. Why did the snake become a motivational speaker?
Because he had a lot of hiss-spirational stories!
6. What do snakes say when they agree?
“That’s exssss-actly what I thought!”
7. Why did the snake run for office?
Because he wanted to lead with s-s-s-sense.
8. How do snakes handle criticism?
They shed it off.
9. Why are snakes great at making decisions?
They don’t rattle easily.
10. What do you call a philosophical snake?
A think-ssserpent.
11. Why did the snake start a podcast?
To share his hiss-terical opinions.
12. What’s a snake’s favorite genre of books?
Twist endings!
13. Why did the snake start meditating?
To find his inner hiss.
14. What did the clever snake say during the debate?
“Let’s not coil this up.”
15. Why did the snake avoid drama?
Because he preferred to stay slither-vilized.
16. Why do snakes love puzzles?
They enjoy untangling things.
17. What’s a snake’s favorite piece of advice?
“Don’t bite more than you can wrap around.”
18. Why are snakes bad at poker?
Because they always give off a tell—a little hiss!
19. What did the snake say after a great idea?
“That was sssuperb!’’
See also 110+ Funny Duck Jokes And Puns
Knock-Knock Snake Jokes
1. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Cobra — Cobra who? — Cobra the door, it’s getting cold in here!
2. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Python — Python who? — Python your shoes before you trip!
3. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Snake — Snake who? — Snake me out to the ball game!
4. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Boa — Boa who? — Boa-ring without me, huh?
5. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Hiss — Hiss who? — Hiss me, I’m sssso funny!
6. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Rattle — Rattle who? — Rattle you’re ready or not, here I come!
7. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Viper — Viper who? — Viper your nose, it’s runny!
8. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Fang — Fang who? — Fang you for letting me in!
9. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Slither — Slither who? — Slither you like it or not, I’m coming in!
10. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Scales — Scales who? — Scales me every time you open that door!
11. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Asp — Asp who? — Asp me no questions, I’ll tell you no lies!
12. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Serpent — Serpent who? — Serpent-tine around the dance floor!
13. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Hood — Hood who? — Hood you like a snake to visit?
14. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Curl — Curl who? — Curl up and enjoy the joke!
15. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Venom — Venom who? — Venom I coming over for dinner?
16. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Tangle — Tangle who? — Tangle up in your garden hose again?
17. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Twist — Twist who? — Twist me once, shame on me!
18. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Sneaky — Sneaky who? — Sneaky snake trying to surprise you!
19. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Flick — Flick who? — Flick your tongue like a real snake!
20. Knock knock — Who’s there? — Wrap — Wrap who? — Wrap me up, I’m cold-blooded!
Snake Jokes One-Liners
1. I’m not afraid of snakes… just their hiss-terical timing.
2. That snake couldn’t find his tail – he lost track of it!
3. I tried to hug a snake… but it just slithered away.
4. My pet snake is an expert at Python – literally.
5. I saw a snake doing stand-up… it was a real boa-mbshell.
6. The snake got a job in tech – now he’s coding in Python.
7. Don’t trust snakes – they’re always a bit rattled.
8. My snake is a picky eater – he only eats hiss-terical meals.
9. Snakes hate tight schedules – they need time to uncoil.
10. That snake’s favorite app? Insta-hiss.
11. I asked my snake to smile… it gave me a hiss instead.
12. The snake joined a band – he’s the lead hiss-trumentalist.
13. My snake loves drama – he’s a real hissy fit.
14. That snake didn’t bite – he just gave me a sidewinder glance.
15. You can’t trick a snake – they’re too sneaky.
16. My snake’s a romantic – he only dates constrictors.
17. I told my snake to chill – now he’s on a cold-blooded vacation.
18. Snakes don’t need legs – they’re already miles ahead!
See also 80+ Funny Turtle Jokes And Puns
Snake Puns
1. You’re hiss-terical!
2. I’m feeling a bit slither-ish today.
3. That’s a real boa-ring joke!
4. I’m trying to scale back on bad puns.
5. Let’s not rattle any feathers.
6. You’ve really got a grip on things.
7. Stop being so constrictive!
8. I’m not venomous, just honest.
9. That idea is a real twist-er!
10. Time to shed the past.
11. Let’s keep it ssssimple.
12. I’m just trying to uncoil after a long day.
13. You’re looking s-sssharp!
14. Don’t be such a hissy fit.
15. Let’s get wrap-t up in this project.
16. I’m having a fang-tastic day!
17. That’s a sidewinder of a story.
18. Be careful, things might spiral out of control.
19. This party is s-s-slithering with fun!
20. That pun was a real strike of genius.
21. Quit hissing around and focus!
22. I’m not cold—I’m just cold-blooded.
23. Let’s recoil and relax.
24. He’s such a sneaky snake.
25. This topic is getting a little wrapped up!
Conclusion
That’s the end of our collection of snake jokes — we hope they made you laugh! From funny snake jokes and cute snake jokes for kids, to clever snake jokes for adults, we covered all kinds of hiss-terical humor.
Did you enjoy the witty snake jokes? Were the knock-knock snake jokes your favorite? Or maybe the short and funny snake jokes one liners got the biggest laugh? And let’s not forget the clever snake puns — they always bring the fun! Thanks for reading, and remember: when life gets boring, just tell a snake joke!